2009 VS 2019

I’m joining the fun 😆 2009 & 2019

2009 me… well that’s me at a park & I decided to pretend to be a bird in nest 🤣🤣 I first had to search my momma’s Facebook to find pictures earlier than 2012 since I had deleted my first Facebook account after a social anxiety when I hit 1K friends lol 🤣 I didn’t want anyone in my business, hated social media & found it to be the world of stalkers… I still believe it to be a world of stalkers – me included – but I’ve embraced it 😆 2009 me was enjoying college life & living on my own for the first time. I was spending the majority of my time at school, theatre rehearsals, or hanging with my family & closest friends. I had struggles with my health where I would get sick more often & for longer periods than those around me but I had not yet been diagnosed with interstitial cystitis or knew of hormonal imbalances, endometriosis, POTS, or the effects of autoimmune diseases & even though my momma suffered from fibromyalgia I didn’t understand chronic pain. I was less political then, less of an activist. I was gentler in nature. More childlike. Was a PLEASER. And obviously a goofball lol I’m still a goofball – I do a great impression of a raptor & water sprinkler lol I love making people laugh, I always have. But I’m a bit rougher on the edges & far more outspoken. I don’t take shit from anyone. I no longer see myself as a little girl but as a strong & confident woman. Politics mean a great more to me. Speaking up against the wrongs in the world are far more important to me. I doubt in 2009 I would have felt confident enough to talk about my poop problems, periods, & all the in depth talks about my body that I easily talk about now. I was not as confident with my appearance. I was always over plucking my eyebrows, obsessed with my face & any lines that are on it, & I admit I hid behind my giant hair. I wasn’t confident with my voice & “Taylorism’s”. I would get embarrassed easier. Pretty much 2009 me was trying to figure out myself going from girl to young woman – it was a push & pull relationship with being confident in the girl but insecure about the woman. Now I’m fucking confident in the woman I am – silly & all 💯😆💚

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